Rogue Ink

April 9, 2008

Welcome IttyBiz Peeps!

Be it known that Naomi over at IttyBiz is my deep and abiding nemesis forthwith, for the cacophony of readers she hath brought to my tiny little blog. As proof, I give you this taunting little note she left me:

Haha. Now you’re going to have to start writing “Content is king” all over your blog and using numbers in your post titles because YOU’RE A REAL BLOGGER NOW! Na na na na NAAAA na.

Oh, very clever, most excellent adversary. Very clever indeed. You think I will be overwhelmed, but I shall prevail! And live to blog another day. Today, actually. ‘Cause, you know. I’m already here.

Today, I’m going to answer an astoundingly relevant question from one of my new commenters, which is: What is it you write about over here, exactly?

I’m SO glad you asked.

No, really. I prepared for this. I had a whole diagram plotted. Graphs and charts and the whole shebang.

Unfortunately, sticking a diagram in here is an aspect of bloggery that I have not yet mastered, so I give you instead

THE ROGUE LIST OF AWESOME

Rogue Ink is going to provide you with a slew of great information on writing professionally, freelancing by the seat of your pants, and blogging rogue-style (which is to say, with no idea what I’m doing). Why Rogue? Because no matter how desperate the situation, I will manage to wiggle my way out of it. I will climb trees, pick locks, and seduce devilishly handsome men to do it, but I will post daily, goddamnit. Here’s what I’ve come up with so far. I’ll be adding things to this as they become necessary.

  • Entrepreneurship: I will be officially founding (and by officially founding, we mean “putting up money to register with the state of Colorado”) my copywriting business, Good Ink (because not everyone likes the idea of a delightfully mischievous rebel writing for their company), on May 1, 2008. I’ll be chronicling all the ups and downs of that venture, including any marketing and business-running advice that has proven useful to me. The good news: my mother’s a marketing guru. The bad news: my aforementioned nemesis is also a marketing guru, and as we have seen, she will stop at nothing. Stay tuned for the ensuing exciting chronicles. If they’re really good, we’ll make them into a comic book.
  • Copywriting: By dint of its being my bread and butter (no, not literally, that would be greasy and disgusting), copywriting is the only topic on this bog on which I am able to speak with authority. And so I shall do so. With aplomb. And that bread and butter. Toasted.
  • Blogging: For the real experts, go check out the ever-growing list of blogging blogs in my links. The stuff you find here on blogging is strictly for newbies, but if you’re like me, you get so desperate looking for matter-of-fact information (HOW do you add an RSS feed?) in a world full of professionals that some of the things I recently figured out may be just what you’re looked for. Here’s hoping.
  • Journalism: I have a dream that one day I will write for Mother Jones and The Atlantic Monthly. I secretly want to be Tom Chiarella. I want to write epic, amazing stories that will make you weep and think and wonder softly to yourself late at night. Until that day, I write a little column now and again for the SF Chronicle’s Employment section, and will be keeping you posted on any new tricks I discover in journalism. And if I ever get any idea what’s really going on in the White House, rest assured, you will hear about it.
  • The War on English: Screw the war on Christmas. Christmas isn’t going anywhere, and I think we all know it. There are, however, powerful threats to the English language out there, and they will stop at nothing until we are all babbling as incoherently as those typo-endorsing, phonetic spelling, technology-addicted HEATHENS who live in the lower ranks of the comment filters. We, the Coalition of English Majors, shall not take this assault to our beloved language lying down. Nay, we shall blog about them, and we shall blog with a righteous fury, and they will know that we are free writers here. Freelancing writers, for the most part. But still. Free as all hell.
  • Off Topic: And now, as Monty Python says, something completely different. These will be the posts that are utterly unrelated to starting, owning, and running a freelance copywriting business. Except insofar as they will generally be starring the exploits, antics, and personal irritations of yours truly, who is the starter, owner, and runner of said freelance copywriting business.
  • Quotes: Quotes are sometimes from famous people, sometimes from other bloggers out there, and mostly just whatever I felt like repeating. It is distinct from Out of Context in that these people wrote it down, and thereby gave their implicit permission to be quoted. Whereas the Out of Context folk were stealth-quoted. That’s why it’s called Rogue Ink. For the stealthiness.
  • Well Played: Sometimes there are people who just do it up right. Occasionally, I’m going to give them some props. Because I grew up in Oakland, and that’s what they called it.

Today’s well played: Naomi of IttyBiz.

A clever gambit indeed, sending your readership over here. I would almost think you meant well. Oh, but I know you have secret plots in store, I do indeed. I will be watching you VERY closely.

If only because your blog is kind of, as we have mentioned before, ridiculously awesome and hilarious. And offers incredible insight into what entrepreneurs should do when they’re scared shitless (this would be me), as well as cutting commentary on bad marketing, truly unique SEO words, and some of the funniest analysis of the current media scene I’ve yet encountered. And your husband is absolutely adorable, and clearly loves you in a deep and abiding fashion.

For making me welcome, for sending your readers, for being clever and funny and encouraging and calling me a bitch several times in a way that somehow made me feel as though I had attained a new level of epic, I would like to say, well played, Naomi. Well played indeed.

Duel at dawn? Your place or mine?

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18 Comments »

  1. Hello from another IttyBiz fan.

    I am also a one month blogger,and I must say, I wouldn’t have guessed that you were if Naomi hadn’t spilled the beans. This looks like it is going to be a fun site and I am looking forward to much more to come.

    I don’t know if I woud have taken on Naomi as a nemesis though…good luck with that… I wish you the best..really I do…:)

    Comment by wendikelly — April 9, 2008 @ 12:30 pm | Reply

  2. High praise, Wendi Kelly. If you’ll link back to your site, I’d love to check in and see how another new blogger is doing out there. We can trade newly found secrets.

    She is a powerful adversary, that Naomi. But all the best nemeses are. Besides, she started it. She sent me an email and the very first thing it said was, “We can’t be friends.” Because she is awesome like that.

    Comment by Tei — April 9, 2008 @ 2:49 pm | Reply

  3. You can thank Naomi for me being here, too. And to top it all off you’re stuck with me now. Well, I have to see how the nemesis thang works out, don’t I?

    Cheers, Tei.

    Lo, you do rock.

    Comment by Sally J. (The Practical Archivist) — April 9, 2008 @ 3:33 pm | Reply

  4. Sally J. : I DO thank Naomi for your being. Yes, the nemesis thing is a secret marketing ploy. Shh! Don’t tell anyone.

    Comment by Tei — April 9, 2008 @ 3:56 pm | Reply

  5. Very funny. I look forward to reading more!

    Comment by devonellington — April 9, 2008 @ 4:03 pm | Reply

  6. AunTei: Can I relish you with adoration publicly now and without all those little nuzzles and kisses that make me waspishly wince? This is a great do and a better do-over and I’m going to keep you accountable and see to it that you don’t dwindle. If the wee gremlin isn’t barfing organic soy-sunflower formula all over you and the naked baby isn’t happily lounging in your room and stealing your Buddha charms, then you’d better be writing! We miss you like mountain air.

    Comment by The Monsters' Mama — April 9, 2008 @ 4:46 pm | Reply

  7. Thanks for answering my question – a fellow grammarian and former English teacher. We *do* have something in common! Also, I heart MoJo… Looking fwd to seeing what you brew.

    Comment by MamaBird/SurelyYouNest — April 9, 2008 @ 4:49 pm | Reply

  8. devonellington: Thank you!

    Taravitch mine: You may ravish me with adoration anywhere and at any time and in full view of whatever fortunate public happen to be passing by at the time. Do keep me accountable, darling, no one does it like you. I miss the naked baby. I miss both naked babies. I miss you.

    MamaBird – Thanks for coming back around to see the answer! Look forward to seeing you on the boards. You should go check out the War on English, I suspect you will have things to say about it.

    Comment by Tei — April 9, 2008 @ 4:58 pm | Reply

  9. Thrilling. I’m so excited to see the shiny newness of the blog. Huzzah. Or three cheers, your choice.

    Comment by Rebecca — April 9, 2008 @ 5:04 pm | Reply

  10. Tei: the Rogue List of Awesome is, well, totally awesome. I look forward to what you have in store.

    Maybe one of these days I’ll have to do the same – you know, actually explain to everyone just what does go on inside my mind.

    But first, I’d better write some more. You may have little fists, but they thump loudly upon the table and I don’t want to keep you waiting for too long.

    Keep up this great work of yours – Brett

    Comment by brettlegree — April 9, 2008 @ 5:40 pm | Reply

  11. Hi Tei…another IttyBiz-er here. I said over there that I would come here and comment and I’m a woman of my word. And anyone who mentions Monty Python in a post has my thumbs up. Good job!

    I too, am in a niche that readers over here (and on most of the great blogs we both seem to reading) have NOTHING to do with. So why do I keep coming back? Well, I want to blog better, write better and I have my own entrepreneur adventures ahead to market (even tho I already freelance…does that count??). So I may as well learn from the best (see your fiery passion blogs above).

    Oh, and I might be able to help out with that ‘Rogue Chick VS Itty Broad’ comic. 🙂
    Cheers!

    Comment by Karen JL — April 9, 2008 @ 5:54 pm | Reply

  12. Karen JL: AWESOME site. Let’s do this comic-book thing. I’ve got to keep blogging for awhile so we can stack up some serious adventures, first. Monty Python rules, indeed. Yes they do.

    Comment by Tei — April 9, 2008 @ 6:06 pm | Reply

  13. Tei,
    Thanks for the offer of linking back!
    I’d love to trade newbie chat with you. Come on over!

    http://wendikelly.wordpress.com/

    Comment by wendikelly — April 9, 2008 @ 11:29 pm | Reply

  14. I love the blog. I adore the header! And… I have just subscribed. Can’t wait to hear more out of you! 🙂

    Comment by Allison — April 10, 2008 @ 1:25 am | Reply

  15. If you’re going to do a comic book, can we make sure my face doesn’t look fat? We had caricatures done over the summer and Jamie looked hot as fajitas, Michael looked adorable, and I looked like a computer monitor. Can we not do that?

    Comment by Naomi Dunford — April 10, 2008 @ 4:03 am | Reply

  16. wendikelly: I’m coming, I’m coming. You blogging people are hard to keep up with.

    Allison: YES! Subscribers rock my word. Complimenting folk do too.

    Naomi: You gots to talk to Karen, dude. She has to pick which one of us is the villain. I imagine that’s the one who winds up with the computer-monitor head. And the bad Russian accent.

    Comment by Tei — April 10, 2008 @ 4:19 am | Reply

  17. Luckily (?) for you guys I suck at caricatures. And drawing women. And people in general for that matter. I prefer to draw animals or really cartoony stuff. How about I make you both kitties or something?

    OK, I lied. I don’t really like to draw at all…I just do it for the money. Yes, I’m an art whore.

    Don’t tell.

    Comment by Karen JL — April 10, 2008 @ 8:15 am | Reply

  18. Well, a day late and possibly a dollar short, but here nonetheless.

    Superb writing and twists of mind. I’m gonna enjoy this!

    Thanks so much!

    Comment by Loraleigh Vance — May 8, 2008 @ 4:58 am | Reply


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