“A bean weevil has the most painful sex known to weevils. The male bean weevil has a barbed penis, to the extent that the female bean weevil dies of internal hemorrhaging shortly after intercourse. Just before she shits out a handful of eggs.”
“You’re just full of dark little fun facts, aren’t you?”
Rogue Ink 
That’s what you posted with the weekend coming up???!!!
That’s what you want floating around in my head on a Friday night when I am alone with my husband and no kids for the weekend???!!!
Naomi…come and get her…
From now on I only read Monday through Thursday.
Comment by wendikelly — April 11, 2008 @ 3:32 pm |
To keep things on a even keel, the follow up post to this one should be “the reproductive cycle of the black widow spider” so that the male meets his untimely demise… 🙂
(which, apparently, only happens rarely, but makes for a good story)
Fair is fair, right?
Comment by brettlegree — April 11, 2008 @ 6:23 pm |
Ok.. try not to get shocked here..
My wife and I have been Naturists for years. Those are the strange people who think it’s fine to take off your clothes when you are hot. I know, we’re disgusting and insane (in fairness, we think all of YOU are the insane ones).
Of course we Naturists joke about people who get all crazy upset at the thought of seeing someone naked. Like “Watch out for penises, you can poke your eye out with one of those!”
But I think if humans did have barbed penises we wouldn’t be so quick to make fun of all you “textiles” (people who wear clothes even when it’s obviously uncomfortable).
Comment by Tony Lawrence — April 11, 2008 @ 7:02 pm |
Tony, Give us credit,
We women are smarter than Weevils, if you had barbed penises, we would kill you first, harvest the sperm and take off with our lives and eggs safely in tow.
No sex for you. Clothes or no clothes.
Comment by wendikelly — April 11, 2008 @ 9:40 pm |
@ Tony: you’re not strange at all, or insane. I totally understand that, my backyard is fully fenced (privacy fencing, and no neighbours with 2 storey houses), and if I said I’d never walked outside in the buff I’d be lying… 🙂
People think I’m a bit nuts too, sometimes, as I like to walk & run barefoot. Hey, it’s the way we came from the factory, right? No shoes, no clothes.
@ Wendi: I love it…
Comment by brettlegree — April 11, 2008 @ 11:04 pm |
Oh, sweet monkey G. You guys are awesome. I love how I come back to this debate. Amazingness.
Wendi – I fixed it. There’s another buffer zone for the weekend between you and weevil sex.
Tony – Nudity is awesome.
Brett – Ditto.
Comment by Tei — April 12, 2008 @ 9:24 am |
I’ve been to enough weevil funerals to last a lifetime – I’m tired of mourning – sniffle, sniffle.
The New Weevil Man-insecto:
1) female weevils should be empowered to use microscopic dildos instead.
2) male weevils should be taught to jerk off
Result: every lil’ weevil lives – no more ‘I died and went to heaven’ sex.
Kapish?
(btw: ittybiz sent me)
Comment by 2ThePoint — April 13, 2008 @ 1:42 pm |
[…] and articles, made to deliver, all day long at Good Ink. Here at the pub we mostly tell jokes about weevil sexbad grammar. and make fun of Sometimes we touch on copywriting, but it is bounded by jokes about […]
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